April Fools ;)

Jadon Lo and Antonio Sacco Crowned New Doubles Golf Champions

By: Hanson Han; Staff Writer

Two students from Mills High School have made history in Dublin, being the first two highschoolers to win the Dublin Doubles Golf Championship. The championship was spread across the span of two days, from March 18 to 19. After all the points were tallied, it turned out that Jadon Lo (11) and Antonio Sacco (11) won the entire competition, barely winning against the previous champions for the past three years, John Proctor and Jay Gatsby of Los Angeles, CA. 

Coming into the competition, Lo and Sacco were major underdogs, going against collegiate level golfers who have been playing since the age of 6 and 9. Lo and Sacco, on the other hand, have only been practicing since the beginning of high school, instantly finding a knack for the sport. Lo and Sacco have reported to the Mills Thunderbolt that they practiced an average of ten hours per week, five on Saturday and five on Sunday. They practice at the Crystal Springs Golf Course, where they have found great chemistry in playing doubles golf, and have since propelled themselves into the spotlight of fame. 

Our very own Mills students have been the talk of the day for many popular sports news shows such as ESPN and CBS Sports. ESPN anchor Huckleberry Finn has said that “these two students from nowhere have pulled the biggest upset in sports history. Jadon Lo and Antonio Sacco have simply done the impossible. They have defeated the reigning champions for the last three years with only a few years worth of practice. These two students will most certainly be the spearhead for the next generation of golfers”. CBS Sports anchor Hester Prynne has also done some interviewing and has uncovered the true feelings of how Proctor and Gatsby feel about the loss to two seemingly amateur golfers. According to Prynne, Proctor has been caught slandering Lo and Sacco on social media, stating unrealistic explanations for why they had won, such as “steroids, swapping out scorecards, as well as witchcraft”. Gatsby has also told Prynne in an interview that he is “extremely upset, and is looking to quit golf due to this tremendous loss”. Gatsby has since then been arrested for attempting to smuggle five truckloads of alcohol across state lines. 

After Lo and Sacco heard the reactions of these previous champions, they felt extremely ecstatic in knowing that they made two high level collegiate athletes essentially rage quit. This has further encouraged Lo and Sacco to continue practicing golf in order to completely dominate next year’s Dublin Double Championship. 

However, Lo and Sacco aren’t the only two doubles preparing for next year’s championship. Two high school seniors, Spencer James and Jordan Baker, have also found golf in a similar fashion. James and Baker both started playing golf during a New Year’s Party. The two, much like Lo and Sacco, have found amazing chemistry as well as a natural talent for golf. Spencer and Baker have been said to have been practicing for hours upon hours in order to have a chance to beat Lo and Sacco in next year’s Dublin Doubles Championship. Finn has dubbed these two athletes the “reincarnation of Proctor and Gatsby”, with the two highschoolers also coming from Los Angeles, CA. 

When interviewing Lo and Sacco about their thoughts on their newfound competition, they simply stated: “We are glad to be able to have some competition in the tournament. The past championship was just a warm-up, so we can’t wait to face some real competitors in next year’s Dublin Doubles Championship”. With these two doubles having almost a year to practice and perfect their game, next year’s championship will be an interesting one to watch for sure.

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