Broken white heart bandaged with red plaster over pink background, Horizontal composition. Broken heart and Valentine's Day concept.

By Brendan Phimsoutham, Staff Writer

As February settles into the new year, people begin to wander aimlessly in their thoughts over the next upcoming holiday: Valentine’s Day. Every February 14th of the year, anyone aware of the general idea believes, or once believed, that the holiday is about a celebratory, romantic love with another individual as their “Valentine”. The idea of this fantasy has led some to believe that to be without a Valentine is to be without happiness. However, the general idea of Valentine’s Day lacks many different factors of the meanings behind this holiday, debunking anyone’s reasoning for feeling absolutely unhappy without a Valentine.

For insight, the known legend and history of Valentine’s Day goes back to 496 AD, when Pope Gelasius I started the feast of Saint Valentine: the celebration of a Martyred saint who secretly married couples to save husbands from war in defiance of the Roman emperor in 270 AD. In consequence, Saint Valentine was thrown into prison and put on death row. In the time before his execution, the jailer’s daughter befriended Saint Valentine after he cured her blindness and left a final farewell note ending in “your Valentine,” the common phrase used at the end of just about every modern day Valentine’s gift.

Nowadays, without knowing the true context of Valentine’s Day, people use Saint Valentine’s name as a role that either needs to be obtained or given to someone else specifically during the holiday. The social expectations around Valentine’s Day extend into the commercial realm. Many people who have a significant other in their life feel obligated to give heart-shaped boxes of chocolates or flowers. The single day generates approximately $13 billion in sales annually, according to Angeline Close Schienbaum, associate professor of marketing at the University of Texas at Austin. Schienbaum conducted a survey in which people expressed frustration with feeling obligated to give gifts on this day, doing it out of duty and not devotion. 

According to Schienbaum’s survey, published in the Journal for Business Research, “most (63%) of males and some (31%) of females feel obligated to give a gift to their partner on this particular day.” Love should be unconditional, and it should never feel forced. Gift giving on one designated day may not be the best way to show one’s love for another. In other words, Valentine’s Day can be made special through gifting, but is not necessary for true love.

Ever since the Greek myth of Cupid shooting a golden arrow at Apollo, who falls madly in love with the nymph Daphne, the ideas of love at first sight and the excitement of falling in love have been highlighted by Valentine’s Day. There are, however, legitimate social critiques of the holiday that are emerging more and more. People who are single can feel lonely and left out and even couples can end up giving gifts and showing their affection out of a sense of obligation, not true love. This may boost the consumer goods industry in mid-February each year, but it doesn’t promote the truest forms of love. Caring, empathetic communication, trust building, and taking care of a loved one’s needs are all better ways of showing love on this day, and in fact, year round.

1 thought on “You Don’t Need a Valentine’s to be Happy

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